A Song of Hot and Cold: The End of Game of Thrones

In the end of Game of Thrones, Jon Snow will marry Daenerys Targaryen. Of course Jon Snow has more than an ounce or two of that royal blood in him (shocker!!!), so this is all kosher. Maybe living a hard life will cure him of some of the entitlement and insanity that followed the royal family. Jon and Daenerys will unify everyone to beat the fuck out of the winter-themed Walking Dead zombies and all of the other unmanageable aspects of the encroaching fantasy world. They’ll get clever and join forces with the better aspects of the encroaching fantasy world, and in that way their new One World Government will lose some of the imbalances that plagued the old white-head Targaryen kingdom that went pear-shaped back in the day.

If Jaime Lannister isn’t dead yet, then he’ll either have a big ass brawl with Jon Snow or the audience will be surprised when that guy becomes Jon Snow’s hardcore buddy. He’ll be his champion and defender. He’ll beat a lot of ass and help put Jon Snow on the throne, thus redeeming himself for killing the old king and redeeming his sketchy-ass family by putting aside the habit of constantly plotting and scheming and instead helping someone else out. He may or may not fuck his sister to death in a weird combination sex scene / battle to the death. Poison may be involved.

That’s about it. I’ll take a screen shot of this so after you guys finish A Song of Hot and Cold Book Seventeen: An End of Ends, you can facepalm yourself and say “I should have believed him. I should have fucking believed him instead of rage-moding in the comments section.”

Keep in mind I’ve only read the first two books and never seen a single episode of the TV series. If any of the characters I’ve mentioned are already dead, then WHOOPS.