I ended up becoming a conspiracy nut. I try to keep a level head about these things. I mean, if you were wealthy and had connections with powerful people, and you were sociopathic and had zero ability to express yourself in any creative way and you had a lust for power (which is what got you into politics or business in the first place), you wouldn’t really try to pull the wool over the eyes of the common man… right? I mean, you’d have to be batshit insane to ever think something like that would happen.

Done by guys in caves. The guys in caves, who only had access to hand-me-down black market gear, were able to somehow trick NORAD into standing down, and then they proceeded to bend over the world’s greatest military superpower. Oh, if only we foolish Americans had a larger military budget, and a political process that wasn’t stymied by the inconveniences of the democratic process…

Turns out we live in a fucking crazy world. The people who have witnessed the inner workings of the machine, and then spoken out against it, have a tendency to… commit suicide.

Fucking aliens. They aren’t real. Nevermind the fact that government files about this shit are classified at such a high level of secrecy that no one the public knows about is even cleared to look at them. Also never mind that fleet of UFOs that flew over Phoenix, Arizona a few years ago. Intelligent life came about on earth because of some kind of miracle; the idea that it could happen elsewhere is crazy and, quite frankly, un-American.

I’ve seen plenty of crap vids on the internet, but I’ve found a few gems in my time. We’re gonna keep things level-headed as fuck in this section. Still, it’s not my fault that this world is crazy as balls.

*     *     *

Hey readers! If you liked this post, you should check out some of my books. I’ve got an epic series called Demonworld, which is equal parts Mad Max and Lord of the Rings (think “science fantasy”), and a much-loved gamebook series called Heavy Metal Thunder which is currently a hyperlinked Kindle book but will be a fancy phone app any day now.

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